Written by Dr. Natalia Kaczmarek, Psy.D. Dr. Natalia Kaczmarek is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist and founder of Indigo Therapy Group.

Updated: 08/23/26

The right therapist isn’t just someone with the right credentials. They should be someone who understands your child’s age, identity, experiences, and needs, while creating a space where your child can actually feel comfortable being themselves. 

Look for a child therapist with relevant experience, an approach that makes sense for your family, and a willingness to treat you and your child as partners in the process.

Key Takeaways

• Credentials matter, but so does fit. A therapist who has the right training and the right relational quality for your child will produce better outcomes than credentials alone.
• Different therapeutic approaches are suited to different presentations. Understanding a therapist’s approach and asking why they use it for your child’s specific concerns is a reasonable and useful question.
• Your child’s comfort with their therapist is clinically significant. A child who does not feel safe with their therapist will not do the work the therapy requires.
• If the first therapist is not the right fit, finding a different one is appropriate. It is not giving up on therapy.

Table of Contents

• What qualifications should I look for in a child therapist?
• How do I know which type of therapy is right for my child?
• Should my child have a say in choosing their therapist?
• How can I tell if my child feels comfortable with their therapist?
• What should I do if the first therapist doesn’t feel like the right fit?
• FAQ

What qualifications should I look for in a child therapist? 

A licensed mental health clinician with specific training and experience working with children in your child’s age range and with presentations similar to what your child is navigating.

The core licensing credentials to look for: a licensed clinical psychologist (PhD or PsyD), a licensed clinical social worker (LCSW), or a licensed professional counselor (LPC). All of these credentials indicate that the person has completed graduate training, supervised clinical hours, and passed a licensing exam. The credential itself does not tell you about the person’s specific experience with children, which is why asking directly about that experience matters.

For a child who has experienced trauma, look for a therapist with specific trauma training and ideally a trauma-focused modality in their toolkit: Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT), EMDR adapted for children, or play therapy with a trauma orientation. For a child with anxiety, look for someone with CBT experience. For a younger child, play therapy training is particularly relevant because it reflects an understanding of how children communicate and process experience.

Research published in PMC on psychotherapy outcomes in children and adolescents found that 54% of young people receiving psychotherapy experienced clinically significant improvement, compared with 32% in control groups. The evidence supports the value of therapy for children. The specifics of the approach and the quality of the therapeutic relationship shape how much of that benefit any individual child receives.

How do I know which type of therapy is right for my child? 

Ask the therapist directly, and pay attention to whether they can explain their reasoning in terms that make sense for your child’s specific situation.

Different therapeutic approaches are suited to different presentations, and a therapist who has thought carefully about the fit between their approach and your child’s needs will be able to articulate why they use what they use. Trauma-focused approaches for trauma. Exposure-based work for anxiety and OCD. Play therapy for younger children who do not yet have the language or the developmental capacity for insight-oriented work. Family therapy when the relational system is a central part of what the child is navigating.

For children who have recently experienced trauma, a trauma-focused approach that does not require immediate verbal narration of the event, such as play therapy or EMDR, is often more appropriate than an approach that moves quickly toward verbal processing. The pacing matters as much as the modality.

What is less useful than a specific modality label: a therapist who describes their approach only as “eclectic” or “holistic” without being able to say what that means in practice for a child like yours. A useful consultation question is: what does a typical session look like for a child in my child’s situation?

Should my child have a say in choosing their therapist? 

Yes, to the degree that is developmentally appropriate, and the benefit tends to be significant when it is possible.

Younger children have less capacity to evaluate a therapist’s approach or credentials, but they can often articulate whether they felt comfortable with someone or whether they want to return. A simple “how did that feel?” after a consultation or first session gives you useful information and communicates to your child that their experience matters in this process.

Older children and adolescents benefit considerably from being involved in the selection process. A teenager who had no say in who they are being sent to talk to is in a very different position than one who had some input. Even small elements of choice, selecting between two therapists who both seem appropriate, or having a direct conversation with the therapist before committing, build the sense of agency that makes voluntary engagement more likely.

For children who are resistant to the idea of therapy, some involvement in the selection can reduce that resistance. It shifts the dynamic from “this is being done to you” to “you have some say in how this goes.”

How can I tell if my child feels comfortable with their therapist? 

By watching what changes and asking open questions rather than evaluating questions.

A child who is comfortable with their therapist does not always talk about therapy in enthusiastic detail. But they tend to go without significant resistance, they may mention the therapist in passing in normal conversation, and over time they will show some change in the areas the therapy is targeting: less distress, more language for their experience, different behavior in situations that were previously difficult.

A child who is not comfortable may show significant reluctance before appointments, may shut down or become upset when the therapist is mentioned, or may explicitly say they do not want to return. These signals are worth taking seriously rather than pushing through.

What does not reliably indicate comfort or discomfort: whether the child comes out of sessions seeming fine or seeming upset. Difficult therapeutic work can produce visible distress. Progress is not always linear or pleasant in the short term. The relevant question is not whether the child is cheerful after sessions but whether, over a period of weeks, the trajectory is moving in the right direction.

What should I do if the first therapist doesn’t feel like the right fit? 

Try another one, and do not treat the first experience as representative of what therapy can be.

Therapeutic fit is a clinical variable with a documented effect on outcomes. A child who does not feel safe, understood, or comfortable with their therapist will not do the work that produces change. This is not a failure of therapy or of your child. It is information about this particular pairing, and the appropriate response is to find a different therapist rather than to continue a relationship that is not working.

Give a new relationship a reasonable window before drawing conclusions. A first session that felt awkward is not enough data. Three to five sessions generally provides a clearer picture of whether the therapeutic relationship has traction. If after that window your child is still significantly reluctant, disconnected, or not improving, that is a meaningful signal.

Child therapy at Indigo Therapy Group in Chicago is offered by clinicians who understand that fit is not incidental to therapy. It is central to it. The consultation process is designed to help you find the right match rather than assigning your child to the next available slot.

Explore our child therapy services and connect with a therapist who can help your child feel seen, supported, and more confident navigating what they’re going through.

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